You may know the comedian, Jeff Foxworthy, with his “You Might Be a Redneck” routine. For those who are unfamiliar, he lists circumstances where if certain things happened, then the person in question might be a redneck. My personal favorite is, “If you’ve ever cut your grass and found a car, you might be a redneck.”
Well, in the spirit of a little good, clean fun, here is my take on Jeff’s idea, as it applies to equestrians. So, in my observation, you might be a horse person if:
You keep your hand on the trunk of your car as you walk around behind it.
You cluck to traffic backups in front of you.
You would rather muck a stall than clean your own house.
You have a vehicle dedicated not only to towing your trailer, but to storing all the stuff you can’t leave at the barn.
You discuss the bean, and deworming with a straight face, regardless of who is within earshot.
You have had to explain to your boss an e-mail on your corporate system discussing sheath cleaning.
You buy more supplements for a horse than you do vitamins for yourself.
Your trailer is cleaner than your car.
You spend more time at the barn than you do at home.
You wish you spent more time at the barn than you already do.
You plan your calendar around clinics, lessons, shows, and events, as opposed to holidays.
You have more books about horses and riding than you do about all other subject combined.
Your wish list for your birthday and the holidays is mostly riding related items.
Your hand cream of choice is the leather conditioner for your saddle.
You secretly evaluate every cat you see for their potential as a barn cat.
You’re on a first name basis with the staff at your local saddlery.
You’re well versed in the subtleties of varying types of buckets.
You go to barn sales, instead of garage sales.
You have a retired barn cat as a house pet.
You can whip your truck around and back into a tight parking space that would cause others to tremble in fear.
You shop at saddlery tent sales to stock up on gifts for barn friends.
You have more copies of horse magazines than your grandmother has copies of National Geographic.
You’re offended by people who dress like an equestrian, but who obviously don’t ride.
What do you think? Let’s hear your ideas about what makes someone a horse person!