It has been too long since we have had a heart to heart. I have had a busy spring, and this weekend will be my first weekend away from home since the championship show last fall.
Mom and I have already done three schooling shows this spring. Three! A poor boy can’t catch a break these days. She is a woman possessed this spring – like she is on a mission and everyone had best stay out of her way. I tried to get out of her way by busting out of my stall, but she was less than amused at my efforts to thwart the third outing of the year.
Two of the shows were at this place that has a lot of high-flying horses and also horses that race around on perfectly good grass and jump bushes and big logs. I can’t figure out why they would choose to jump over fences or bushes. That seems like a lot of extra work. Why not just run around them? I could show them fence deconstruction techniques that are rather effective. Or, here’s a thought, how about not run at all and just eat the grass? Such silly ponies. Mom did let me taste some of the grass before and after we worked. It was very delicious. I think all shows should offer it to the competitors – a snack bar for horses if you will. There is a snack bar for the people, and I think since we are doing most of the work that we should have one too. I shall have to remember to bring this up with show management at each of the shows this year.
I like these little shows since it means that I still get some time in my paddock to play with my brother and I get to sleep at home. Yes, I get a stall at the away shows, but with the late night visits with my selfie buddy and the fact that the new barn makes scary noises, I don’t sleep as much and get very tired by Sunday.
And I must say that poor Mom needs some directional help. At the last show, I almost had to change my name and disassociate myself with her. Mind you, she had Ms. C READING the test and we have ridden Second Level Test 2 many times already so it wasn’t like she didn’t know which way we needed to turn. I even tried to strongly hint to her that she was trying to turn the wrong way and I tried to go to the left as called for by the test and Ms. C…but the crazy woman insisted that we do a second turn on the haunches to the right. Umm, Mom, we just went that way, it is time to go LEFT!! The judge never rang the bell, but politely told Mom that she failed to demonstrate a turn on the haunches to the left. Mom laughed. I just hung my head in shame.
Thankfully I have heard through the grape vine that she has now enlisted the help of a six year old for some tips on remembering which way is left. (“The left hand makes the ‘L’ Ali.”) Hopefully Mom has practiced making the “L” so that we don’t have another misstep this weekend. If you are reading this and will be at the show grounds, remind her to avoid the other left and stick with the correct one.
And, in case you hadn’t heard, I’m 8 years old now. That’s like 25 in human years so I am waiting for the opportunity to have more of a say in what I do and don’t have to do. My brother doesn’t have to go places or work hard, so I think it is high time I get to live like him. When I asked him about approaching Mom with the idea, this was his response:
He thinks he is such a comedian. I am not amused. I will just have to figure things out on my own. Stop by my stall this weekend if you have any tips to share.